Tis the Season to be Whatever Your Are
Tis the season to be jolly….but what if you’re not? As we wish each other days that are “merry and bright,” can we also leave room for the full spectrum of emotions that may surface during the holidays? Here’s an alternative holiday jingle (unlikely to top the charts, but worth considering): May your days be […]
I Can’t Hear You
My Favorite Word of the Week?“What???”Closely followed by:“I can’t hear you,”“Say it again,”and “Please come closer.” Yep, part of my hearing is gone. Maybe it was due to a cold or sinus infection, but the idea of a life without sound terrifies me. I found myself humming Joni Mitchell’s iconic line: “You don’t know what you’ve […]
The Power of Kindness (First lessons from recovery)
I’m five weeks into my recovery from hip replacement surgery, and things are going well. By well, I also mean SLOWLY. It feels like I’ve been “off-line” forever, with plenty of time to contemplate learnings along the way. My biggest take-away is about kindness. But first, a digression. In their desire to encourage me, some […]
Time to shout “no” to misogyny
I wish it were easy to just say no to a force that has been weighing us down for centuries—affecting our bodies as well as our brains and infesting our social and political systems. In case you need a refresher on blatantly evil signs or misogyny (I know you don’t), they include: What’s not as obvious […]
Have you taken the AI challenge
(Hint: It helps to be human) The rapid advance of AI technology feels dizzying, exciting, and terrifying. New technology is outpacing our capacity to understand its consequences. Moral reasoning, unfortunately, cannot be rushed into production. Neither, alas, can human caring. Maybe it’s time to ask Alexa (Google’s AI assistant), “Alexa, how do we make the […]
A Gift from an Unusual Source
What if you could strengthen the qualities you need by feeling your connections with friends who have died? I know this may sound a little weird, but hang with me. You don’t need to believe in the afterlife, or really anything, to follow what I’ve been discovering. That’s often the case with folks we have loved […]
What to say (or not say) to a friend who is dying
Thanks for reading—it’s not easy to think about losing a friend, let alone what to say. I’m not thinking today about the pretty picture of sharing precious moments at the bedside of someone who is resting peacefully, knowing she is about to leave as her family waits with her, holding her hand. In this loving scenario, […]
All You Need is Love (but skip the roses)
I’m writing this on the National Day of Loving, aka Show-People-You-Love-Them-By-Spending-Money-on-Them Day, aka Valentine’s Day. How did we get started with this super-capitalist tradition? I assumed that there was a noble Saint Valentine, a high priest of love, tucked somewhere in history. The legends about this dude, however, are murky, and it appears there was […]
Blessing the glad and the sad
Thanksgiving in the US is almost here, the day we sit around the table, hopefully with family and friends, and share with each other what we are grateful for. Usually, it’s the good stuff—what has made us smile or given us joy—the “glads.” But this year, I feel drawn to also give thanks for the […]
Beyond Barbie (What would you say in your speech?)
When I was eight, the girls in my neighborhood loved playing with dolls. I didn’t. I preferred to explore the Connecticut woods and ride around on my Schwinn bicycle. As the girls down the street were unwrapping their first Barbies on a sunny fall day, I cruised the area, wind in my hair, not knowing […]
